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Be gone

So,
how dare you kill me with your worded sword
and have me floating amongst the living?

So,
how dare you wreck my gullible heart
and still skip around me like it’s some sort of joke?

I’m a phantom. Dead but alive
Alive because your beauty keeps me grounded
dead because your beauty isn’t mine.

Be gone so I’m completely gone.
because of you I can’t live.
unless,
unless,
maybe,

unless,
you blow air my way so your scent is within me
touch my neck to feel reality
to feel of this dimension
make love to the ghost that I am
Make me yours again,
live again.

I have met death.
He said I’m pathetic. That he needs a refund from the reaper.

Make me live again from your presence or just fucking leave.
or just fucking leave

Im tired of depending on your voice to tame my skin
Tired of running after my heart, giving it the talk, telling it that no, he’ll never be back. You weren’t big enough for him. you weren’t whole enough.
You weren’t enough.

Tired of waking up and weeping realizing that you aren’t beside me
Tired of giving meanings to my favorite songs
even if it has nothing to do with you I will damn near give meaning to every word of every song I hear
to every word of every book I read
to every word I hear.

God damn
leave me the fuck alone
Be fucking gone so I can be

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