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I Am The Mountain

I am the mountain
not who climbs it.
There are no struggles to overcome,
I wouldn’t call them that.

Dust bunnies

I’ll dust off my shoulders and walk on by

They are minuscule compared to me, the giant.
They have no place in my heart,
no place around me and no place behind.
I am too big to carry anything but myself.

I’ll dust off my shoulders and walk on by.

For years, I have made up metaphors of climbing this mountain/hill that is my past where I trip and fall but climb back up.

Yesterday, changed it all.
Mom suggested I go with her to a special yoga session where all women who went through abuse came together for it.

I didn’t think much of it except that it would be nice to stretch since I haven’t for a while.

I’ll tell you how it went;
Just to let you know it was for two hours

  • Came in with our mats and blocks, a piece of paper and pen in front of us
  • We started off with a calming pose for 15 minutes
  • then we wrote down all our traumas and everything we called abuse. You could see that some teared up, some needed more than one paper, and some were hiding their faces. Some actually stopped writing, remember one more thing so they went back to writing.
  • we then went outside, there was a lit can where we threw in our papers of abuse and let it set aflame
  • we circled around the fire holding each others hands saying a mantra I am sorry, please forgive me, thank you seven times
  • went inside did a pose for 15 minutes

my favorite part was next

  • We had to write down a love letter to our selves
  • A pose for 30 minutes where the lady next to me snored so I thought hey! let me sleep too 

So, this whole two-hour process made me realize that the struggles I am going through are minuscule compared to how big I am in the world
I had a fear of being a mother but now I’m ready to be what I call a momther
I am the mountain,
I am pure,
I am myself,
Iman.

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