“Maryam has gotten the Austin Martin she always wanted! took her a lot of savings” Huda speaks as my blood boils. Ah, another mission. It aches my brains how her car is now better than mine. A whole life savings huh?

I drink my cocktail and pay the bill. Told Huda I have something to do. I was already in a lot of debts but nothing like that could stand in the way.


“why would you do that? we’re in so much debt as it is. Our kids will have to pay for them. Please stop this” He says this more sad than angry and honestly that stresses me. Ahmed is the kind of husband that goes crazy at the little things I do. Most things I’ve done weren’t little so you can imagine what could’ve happened.

I sigh, “look. I’ll take care of this okay?”

“what, you’re gonna cancel the car? are you gonna sell your three others? What are you going to do exactly to fix this?” He looks angry but his eyes tell otherwise.

“Trust me, i-” he cuts me off “Don’t even bother explaining.” he says as he leaves our room. “I’ll take the kids with me to my mothers house for a week. I need a break from you”

I stand there looking at him leave. I don’t beg him to stay nor try to reason with him. No use. Admittedly, I am full of shit. With the type of money we owe, there is no way I can help or even find help. I’d sell a car or two but that would only cover so much. Plus, I probably won’t. I want to have a good amount of cars to have peoples jaws drop. And also, I can’t stand having something less of a worth than my friends or probably anybody.


Been a week since the car came in and my husband and kids have yet to come. I’ve texted him but he wouldn’t reply. Called my kids cellphones but they wouldn’t answer. He knows I won’t go to him. I despise his mother. Something about the aroma in the house and her detest towards me. She once asked Ahmed why he’d marry a greedy whore, that if it was because of looks then she’s disappointed. That only people that pretty could be so evil. It was all said while i was right beside him. The day I told the family I was pregnant again after two miscarriages. With the sole reason to have more kids than Hanan. Everyone knows I hate kids.


“Can you imagine the romance?” she says while her eyes drift off to her past memories. “Being in rome with Omar saved our marriage. So full of adventure and beauty. We came back as different people I tell you that!” A hand on her chin and the memories keep flowing past her. She’s still talking but i can’t keep up. As soon as she said Rome something in me clicked. Ah, a new mission is it?

I smile.



Source of the picture:  James Ensor, L’Envie, from the 1904 portfolio The Deadly Sins, Art Institute of Chicago; Paul Cadmus, The Seven Deadly Sins:  Envy, 1947, Metropolitan Museum of Art, New York.

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